Bob's Theory of Relativity of Love

By Bob Peterson

In this article, I'd like to present a few ideas about Love and what Love means to me. It is not meant to be a definition of Love--I don't think Love can be defined, only described. This article is not an essay on what Love "should" or "should not" be--I'm not sure there are any "shoulds" when speaking about Love. The ideas in this article are only my opinions. I'm also sure that none of the ideas in this article are new or original because Love has been around longer than I have.

I'd like to explain a thing I call "Bob's Theory of Relativity." Stated simply, it says that everything Einstein said about light also applies to Love.

Einstein's theory of relativity states that matter and energy are relative, and light is a constant. If a car travels in one direction at 10 miles per hour and another car travels in the opposite direction at 10 miles per hour, then each car is traveling at 20 miles per hour, relative to the other. However, if each of those cars carries a light, the light waves have the same speed in all directions, and not 20 miles per hour faster or slower in any direction. In terms of Love, I believe that when we Love anyone or anything our Love spreads throughout All That Is in all directions; we are, in effect, loving All That Is, but using another person, as our focal point.

One frequency of electromagnetic radiation does not interfere with other frequencies (for instance, many radio stations can occupy the same space and time.) In the same way, I believe that one Love will never interfere with another Love. This means, for instance, that the Love we have for our friends and family will not diminish our Love for our spouses or Lovers. This also means that you don't need to stop feeling Love for one person in order to start loving another. Love always accepts other Love. This leaves no room for jealousy. Love is NOT possessive.

Light is eternal, not bounded. A light that is shone outside will continue to travel through outer space forever, without becoming "less." It may seem to diminish because it spreads and expands to cover more area. Love is also unbounded. Once we feel Love, that Love continues to exist in some form, even if we don't feel it any more. This also means that Love is never wasted. For instance, even if we suffer a bitter breakup and now hate for our former partner's guts, we can still look back on the happier times, without regretting that it ever happened.

Love never limits; it is unlimited. When light hits an object, it is either reflected or absorbed, increasing the object's energy, or both. By the same token, when we feel love for someone, it either "warms" that person or is passed on, or both.

And light, when focused and directed (like telescopes and microscopes) permits us to see things that are out of the reach of our senses. Love, when it is focused and directed, also permits us to see things--It permits us to learn about people and things, which would be unknowable without that Love. More importantly, it permits us to learn about ourselves. Love expands our horizons. Perhaps Love is the source of all psychic awareness.

Love is not a set of limitations, such as "I don't want you to Love others." Instead, Love is a set of freedoms. A few examples I've thought up are: I give you the freedom to be yourself, the freedom to express yourself to me in any and all ways, the freedom to vent your Love in my direction, the freedom to express your sexuality with me, the freedom to laugh and play and act silly without fear of my ridicule or attack in any form, the freedom to express and enact your Love for me and for others, in whatever way you most desire, whether I am focused in physical life, or not.

In the same sense that sexuality is an expression of Love and not the other way around, so too I believe that "faithfulness" is an understanding and communication between souls, instead of sexual exclusivity. I'd never deny my mate her chance to roll in the hay with Mel Gibson, if that were one of her cherished fantasies. And I'd never hide my lusts from her.

I believe that Love holds no fear. Fear is a result of making assumptions and expectations, and I believe that Love makes no assumptions, and holds no expectations about anyone or anything. Love never takes anything or anyone for granted.

Love is unconditional acceptance. Love means that the innermost you is okay. Love prefers the real you, and not someone who is pretending or wearing masks. And by the same rule, Love accepts everyone else as they are.

Love doesn't apply to images, ideals or our ideas of a person, not even our images of ourselves. Love applies only to the real person above and beyond the images.

And the joy in Love is not in the receiving, but the giving.

Just as Einstein said that matter and energy are one, so too I believe that Love comprises All That Is, binding the very atoms together.

For in a world where everything is relative, Love itself is the only absolute.